Rest anyone?

Last Tuesday through Friday I received a great gift. A very generous and anonymous member of the Cumberland Presbyterian Church has funded retreats for pastors at a bed and breakfast in East Tennessee. All expenses are paid, including the food. The location, Whitestone Inn, is beautiful and relaxing, The service is wonderful. 

I did almost nothing. I listened to books on tape...

As an aside, when going to a bed and breakfast in the middle of nowhere, it may be advisable to avoid Agatha Christie novels, where, inevitably, a group of people who don't know each other very well find themselves in a picturesque bed and breakfast somewhere and start dropping dead.

I also put together a jigsaw puzzle and did a few crossword puzzles, did a little working out, and played the guitar (working on a good blues vibe). Other than that, I ate and slept.

I did not check my e-mail while on the trip. At the end of three days I had 245 unread e-mails.

Folks, we are overwhelmed in this modern day.

Don't get me wrong--I love technology. I like to get new technological gadgets. I think all of these things are neat and cool and fun. I used to try to stay up on latest developments, and they are just going too fast for me to do that anymore, but I do enjoy them.

But I don't think we were designed for this.

Humanity developed over a time when none of these things were accessible or could even be dreamed up. For a moment, just realize that it has only been a little more than five hundred years since the printing press was invented. Before that, all books were written by hand! How many books could you have in your library? Newspapers? No way! How did people get information? Word of mouth? Town meetings?

Think how short that time period has been in the history of humanity. And now consider, have we had enough time as a species to adapt to the accessibility of books? In 500 years, after not having books for the first thousands of years of humanity, are we yet able to adapt to books?

Maybe. Maybe not.

But in the last fifty years, how much information has come at us? In the last twenty years how have our relationships to technology changed? In the last ten years, how much have our phones become practically part of our bodies? 

Does anyone else feel overwhelmed by this? Anybody out there feel some stress when you realize how fast life is paced? 

I remembered something that was only just remaining in me, a memory of a time when I wasn't connected to every part of the world every moment of every day. I didn't turn on the television. I wish I could have brought myself to turn off my phone, but what if something REALLY important happened? I mean, how could I turn off my lifeline?

I'm no psychologist, but could this information overload be contributing to mental illness, depression, other disorders? 

I wish I had an answer. But I was reminded that although time seems short, we still must take time to attend to ourselves and heal from the wounds inflicted by the world. That time needs to be away from the buzzing of the phone on vibrate, the swarm of e-mails, and the talking heads of the news channels.

Take time.

Take time.

Get rest.

Women in Ministry

Recently there has been a lot of talk about women in ministry. The call from Southern Baptist John MacArthur to writer Beth Moore to "go home" should be a call to arms for all of us who are past ready to break with traditional patriarchy and affirm that God is fully capable of choosing who God intends to call to ministry without input from us (especially us white men who seem to be threatened by anyone who doesn't look like us who gains authority).

I want to highlight just one aspect of women in ministry that I have found to be essential as I work alongside Joy Warren, my wife and co-pastor at the church where I serve. There are many, many more reasons to affirm these calls, but this one is on my heart today.

Men, in case you didn't know it, women have different lived experiences than we do. People of Color have different lived experiences than whites in the United States. People in the LGBTQ+ community have different lived experiences than straight cis-gendered people. We cannot fully understand one another's lived experiences, but through careful listening without judging we often can make a lot of progress.

I mention people of Color and the LGBTQ+ community alongside women in this post because in the history of religious culture in the Western world, straight, white men have had a consistent monopoly on power for a long time, often using scripture itself to legitimate that monopoly. The fight for acceptance of one marginalized community is, to me, the fight for them all.

In my location, I have found that I am not able to do the same kind of work with people that Joy is able to do. Sure, there are some men and even some women who are reluctant to accept her authority as a clergy person without a Y chromosome. More importantly than that, there are many women who cannot be cared for in the same way by a male pastor.

Some may find this hard to understand, but imagine yourself a victim of violence at the hands of a man. Imagine yourself a woman having been raped, assaulted, objectified by men. Imagine then that the only authority in your church is another man. Can you feel safe relating your story of abuse? Can you feel safe talking about other issues and not be afraid that another man you trust may betray your trust?

I know stories of women who have made that hard decision to trust their male pastor and who have them been victimized by that pastor. It is horrible. It is detestable. It does happen.

Could anyone blame a woman for feeling more comfortable in a counseling setting, in a pulpit setting, or in any pastoral relationship with a woman? I certainly can't.

Us straight white men often have a hard time even imagining that someone might consider us unworthy of being clergy. Or of being just about anything. But take a moment to think about how that might feel, straight white men.

And then think how it would feel to have scripture thrown in your face telling you God had ordained that you aren't worthy. Only people like us are worthy. Only straight white men who worship a Savior who was Middle-Eastern and who they insist was not sexual at all. By the way, many add A to the LGBTQ grouping to represent someone who is Asexual, a term that likely would describe the way many Christians view Jesus.

We've got to get this right. We have to make space for people to care for one another with then authority of God and the authority of the Church behind them. We certainly do when we find a straight white man who was a murderer, and we say that this person can reach out to criminals because he is one of them. But so many won't do the same for good, loving people who are women or labelled some other way.

Is that really what Jesus wanted? For us to fight about who can be called instead of celebrating that God is calling more and more people?

That's the view today...

It's all personal

I have made a consistent point at different times in my ministry. Sometimes it has been blunt, and sometimes it has been more subtle, but when I am told that I am being too political, and it doesn't happen too often, my response is that everything is political. Politics just means that something is about people, and if it isn't about people, then it probably isn't going to come up in a usual sermon.

Lately I have seen some claims that when talking about people in the church, including in the areas in which people are qualified to serve, those claims can be made on an intellectual and theological basis. In other words, it's nothing personal, I'm just saying what I think, or what God thinks (as if anyone knows this for certain).

My response to that is similar to the response about politics. If it's about people, it's personal. Now, it may not seem personal to the speaker, because the speaker is talking about a community to which he or she does not belong. But speak to people from that community about the words spoken, and it will quickly become apparent that those words feel awfully personal.

I am a fan of NPR, and I was saddened this week to hear that long time newswoman, Cokie Roberts, passed away. I heard an excerpt of a story in which one of her colleagues mentioned that women were granted the right to vote on such and such date, and she cut in to say that women weren't granted the right to vote by some benevolent white male force, they were already American citizens. They won the fight to be able to vote legally.

That was a seemingly innocuous phrase, and one that is used all the time--"granted the right to vote"--but to Roberts that language was personal. And she was right.

How many human rights violations have been perpetrated because something wasn't personal, it was "just the way it is?" Slavery based on racism, Jim Crow laws, laws that subjugate women, the "science" of Eugenics, all based on claims of truth given by people appealing to tradition, to science, and to religion.

We have to stop reducing people down to their ethnicity or their religion or their sexuality or their age or whatever when we talk about others. Each person is an individual. Each person is precious in the sight of God. Each person deserves respect. Each person deserves to be heard. Talking about people as if they are impersonal objects like tables or computers isn't giving people the dignity they deserve. And don't ever believe that rejection of a person isn't personal. It may be wrapped up in quasi intellectual or theological speech, but it is very personal. Every time.

That's my view today.

Getting Excited

Maybe it's just the circles I have run in, especially the world of academics, that gives me this impression, but I have found that it doesn't seem very "cool" to get excited over something. I don't mean getting excited in an angry or pessimistic way. That is totally cool. What I mean is getting excited because you are joyful about the present and future of something.

It seems that the moment someone gets excited about something, there is someone nearby to temper that enthusiasm, either with negative words about whatever it is, or a joking sarcasm that somehow the person has gone over the top. I think this happens in the world of music a lot, when someone discovers a new band or a new song and when they share it with someone else, that person downplays the goodness of the music. Maybe they even make fun of the first person because they have gone overboard. I have been on both sides of this. My apologies to early Justin Bieber fans.

I find that this happens so much that we are almost afraid to get excited about something. It's probably a defense mechanism, but if we are excited about something going on in our lives, maybe a new project that we are working on, maybe a new relationship in our lives, we almost automatically downplay our excitement when we tell someone else about it. It is probably fear of ridicule that causes us to do this.

But this robs us of our chances to be really happy about things in our lives. What a joy it is to find something new and enjoy it and not worry about how other people might react. What a joy it is to work toward something and see some fruit of your labor and just be happy in the moment that you reflect on what you've done.

And what a joy it is to just be happy about where you are! There's no shame in being excited about your life, your home, your church. There's no reason to fear being thought "uncool" because you are too enthusiastic about something you love. There is no joy in pretending that you don't really like whatever it is as much as you do so you won't seem weird or naive. This doesn't mean to willingly ignore the junk of life, but don't be ashamed of being happy in your work, your place, your church, your life.

If we need anything, we need more joy in the world. We need to give ourselves and others permission to just be excited about something we love or enjoy. Just be happy about it.

That's my view today...

Some days are tumblier than others...

Years ago I served a church as music director, and the secretary of the church thought that Christopher Warren sounded a lot like Christopher Robin, so that's what she called me. One day I came in and had a gift from her that was a mug with several of the characters from the classic Milne stories about Winnie the Pooh rolling around in the grass. The caption underneath the scene was "Some days are tumblier than others."

I have been reflecting on this saying this past week. Some days are tumblier than others, and some days are a lot something else-er than others. Maybe you have had a particularly something-er day recently.

Some days are harder than others. Some days are exciting-er than others. Some days are sadder than others. Some days are boring-er than others. And yes, at almost 45 years old, some days are tumblier than others.

As I say often in the church, when I am preaching, much of what I say is because I need to hear it. So please know that I need to hear this as much or maybe more than anyone.

Every day is something-er than others. Within that statement is an important implication. Other days are less whatever than that day. In fact, most days are less whatever than that day. If you have had a bad day, a bad time, some days are badder than others. But that means most days are gooder (better) than those bad days.

So, when things are rough and tumble and scary and frustrating, remember that some days are rougher and tumblier and scarier and frustrating-er than others. But the other days are coming where things will be better-er.

I pray this gives you (and me) hope for those bad times which come in every life.

That's the view today.

Do Your Research

I may have coined a new phrase in a recent sermon. I don't know if I'm the first person to use it, but as far as I know, I hadn't heard it before. My phrase was "don't go off half-cocked and totally cocky."
Maybe it'll catch on...

What I meant by that was it is really frustrating when someone gets a little bit of information, leaps to a conclusion, and then sticks to that conclusion. You remember Chicken Little? Versions of the story vary, but one of the earlier versions is that an acorn fell on Henny Penny's head, and from that Henny Penny concluded that the sky was falling. This meant the end of the world to Henny Penny, and she went around the barnyard telling everyone to take cover because the sky itself was caving in.

Here's how she went off half-cocked: Henny Penny didn't do any research, any checking to see if the terrible things she expected were actually happening. She didn't even look to see what had landed on her. She jumped to a conclusion. She really didn't even know what she was talking about. That's what I mean by half-cocked.

Here's how she went fully cocky: in light of any new information, any questioning, any possibility she might be wrong, Henny Penny stuck to her original conclusion. Nothing could change her mind. She knew the truth, and anyone who disagreed was foolish, stupid, or misinformed.

What a powerful story Chicken Little is. It is such a good glimpse into human nature as well. I should also add it is an insight into the way people read the bible. You probably knew I was going there, I'm a pastor, after all.

The bible is a rich and complex anthology of books about many different topics, including different types of literature (histories, laws, moralistic stories, proverbs, poetry, apocalypses, you get the point) written by any number of different people over the course of almost 2000 years. Trying to read the bible without understanding the culture of the time in which the words were written, the languages in which they were written, the people for whom they were written, the problems they were trying to solve or the issues they were trying to resolve by writing those words is difficult, if not impossible. And much of the information that we need to be sure what the authors meant is simply not available to us.

The bible does have an overall ethic, however. It stresses caring for one another and revering God. If something is not loving to a neighbor, it doesn't gel with the overall ethic of the bible. If something does not place God in the most important spot, it isn't of the bible.

Try to resist going off half-cocked and fully cocky when reading scripture or when listening to someone who wants to tell you what it says. Do your research. See what others are saying about a certain passage. Read different translations. Read commentaries. These tools have never been as available as they are now in the information age.

That will help keep us from jumping to conclusions. Being cocky about our conclusions is never in order. I have seen people--some pastors-- sarcastically dismissing others because they do not have the same interpretation on a passage or issue. Calling someone stupid or acting as if they are stupid is not biblical. Time and again Jesus showed us how to be humble even as we are being firm in our convictions. And remember, Jesus, who we look to as the number one most awesome human ever, allowed his mind to be changed in a conversation with a woman who he basically called a dog. Humility, research, mindfulness of other perspectives--these are the loving and Christian ways to handle disagreements over our sacred text.

At least, that's the view from where I'm standing...

Grace

Who's your biggest critic?

If you are anything like I am, it didn't take long to figure the answer to that one out.

By far, I am my own biggest critic.

It's unhealthy, I know.

It's frustrating, I know.

It's counterproductive, I know.

And still there it is. Somewhere inside me is a character who plays the role of the judge. Whenever I do something--it could be anything--the judge comes around to inspect the product of my labor. And the judge usually finds something lacking.

It's exhausting.

Yet, when I try to look at things from a different perspective, attempting at least to see things from a new angle, I can see that I have created this character in order to help me to be my best self. I have internalized the idea that judging myself harshly will make me better at what I do.

Where I got this idea, I do not know. This judge is sometimes out of control. Instead of helping me to do better, the judge paralyses me from moving forward.

I don't know how prevalent this is in the world, but if my sense of other humans is even partially right, I think a lot of people have this kind of internal dialogue going on. Here are the words that I want you to hear. They are the words I need to hear myself. I hope they can give you and me a sense of grace about ourselves today.

You are imperfect. In fact, imperfect is the best any of us can ever hope to be. There is no reason to expect perfection. There is no reason to expect that you have everything figured out on whatever you are up to before you even begin. There is no reason to expect that even if you do have everything figured out that you will do things perfectly and have no mental or physical lapses while you are doing whatever it is.

Being human is beautiful. You are beautiful, right now, with all those imperfections. Certainly work to be better, but always remember that better has limitations.

And don't compare yourself to people you think are better. You'll find, if you come to know them, that they, too have insecurities and fears and imperfections. Ain't none of us perfect!

No, you aren't perfect. But you are whole. You are loved. You are God's. You are You.

Have grace where it is often hardest...for yourself.

That's the view today.

Learning Something New

It takes time to learn something new. I don't mean learning the information itself, necessarily, but internalizing what you have learned can be a long process. When something comes up that challenges your prior understanding, the longer you've held that understanding, the longer it can be to change.

I have been reflecting recently on something I learned my freshman year of college. It has taken me a long time to internalize it, partially because of the shock in the lesson I learned because of the background I had.

My first year of college I joined in with a campus religious organization. My good friend Mike was the music leader for the meetings we had, and he encouraged me to go. I thought it would be a good opportunity to meet some new people on campus, and I was right. It was a small group and I got acquainted with a few students there.

One young woman I met there I knew only by her name and by sight. We hadn't really had any conversation, but she seemed like someone I would like hanging around with. So, when I was out at a local coffee shop, and I saw her, I greeted her in a way that I thought was warmly. "Hey, girl!" I shouted out when I saw her.

I learned that night that "Hey, girl!" is not an appropriate greeting for everyone.

At first I was baffled by her rebuke. Why would someone be angry when I was clearly being friendly? Then I was embarrassed, angry, confused-- several different emotions. I never spoke to her about that moment, and probably never spoke to her at all again. But I am grateful for the lesson, even though it took me a long time to understand.

My using the word "girl" was demeaning, even if I didn't intend it. It belittled her in comparison to me. White men have been doing this to women and people of color since time immemorial. It is so common I didn't even know why someone would be offended. It was years before I would fully understand.

I still make mistakes like this one sometimes, and when I do, I try to be more understanding when I am corrected. The way we talk to one another matters. The way we talk about one another matters. No one should be spoken of or to as less than. Period.

My situation was embarrassing but it wasn't of great importance in the world. But the way we talk about one another, maybe especially world leaders speak to and about one another, does change the way the world works. Respect, dignity, and kindness are things it costs nothing to offer to one another, but how rarely we see those gifts given. Even unintentional slights can change or sever relationships.

My view from where I stand today is to simply be aware of how our words referring to others can sound, even if we don't mean them in the way they are taken. Instead of building a defensive wall by blaming the person who was offended, simply take time to see why they might feel as they do. If we do this, we just might learn something new.

Seeing From Another Place

This past week the denomination I serve, the Cumberland Presbyterian Church, had our General Assembly. For the past several years, we held our General Assembly concurrently with our sibling denomination, the Cumberland Presbyterian Church in America. The story of the two denominations that share a confession, a constitution, a directory of worship, and almost all other documents is more complicated than I could explain here. It is certainly more complicated than I even know.
To summarize, the Cumberland Presbyterian Church in America was formed in the years after the Civil War by Black Cumberland Presbyterians who wanted to have their own churches, autonomy, and the ability to determine their own direction as a denomination. The result is that in 2019 we still have two different denominations of Cumberland Presbyterians based almost solely on race.

Our General Assemblies have been working together toward unification for many years. There have been several major attempts, and some have come very close to unifying, but so far we remain two separate institutions.

Last week at our concurrent General Assembly meetings, both assemblies voted to send the plan for union to the presbyteries of our churches as part of the unification process. We may be on the road to finally coming together as one denomination again.

From one point of view, it seems that there is no reason we would not be unified. All the major documents are shared. All the theological statements are shared. Our form of government is the same. When I first looked at this issue, it seemed there was an easy solution. But I was naïve.

I work hard to try to see the world through eyes other than my own. I know I can never fully understand what a woman goes through or what a member of the LGBTQ community goes through or what an immigrant to the United States goes through, as hard as I might try. And I can never understand what a Person of Color goes through in the United States.

I did receive some clues as this process has gone on. Some of the resistance has been about things that might not have occurred to me. There is fear about the way each church will be represented. Will the Cumberland Presbyterian Church in America simply be swallowed up and no longer have a voice in the church? There is fear about the use of property by the new church. In our system, Presbyteries own property, not local churches, and there is fear that the presbytery will sell the properties of some churches to benefit others.

Initially these scenarios seemed unlikely to me. But I have to realize that this is the way history has treated my Black sisters and brothers. They have been discriminated against, not allowed to register to vote, their property has been given to whites, their voices have been drowned out. I know I can't see things from their point of view accurately, but when fears like these are voiced, I have to try to see why these fears are real. And I have to conclude, they are very real, because that is the lived reality of a Black person in the United States.

Once again, I hope to be aware enough that I can pledge to stand with those who have been mistreated, abused, overlooked, and ignored. I only know part of the stories of the people who have been treated this way, but I hope to hear your stories, stand with you while you take the lead for your autonomy, and work with you for justice. I believe God intends an end to injustice, favoritism, prejudice, and all forms of abuse, systematic and individual. If you are a white, straight, cisgendered man like me, we have to lay down some of our privilege and listen. Listen to how others have been mistreated by people like us.

Then we can hope to begin to heal the divides.

May God help us.

That's the view from where I stand today...

Complicated Systems

This morning Joy and I had a bit of bad luck. Joy was taking a friend to a very important meeting when suddenly our car, the car I bought new in 2009 and has been nothing but perfectly reliable for us, stopped running. I was just about to leave for work when I got a frantic phone call from our friend, letting me know what was going on

Thankfully the car conked out only a few blocks from the meeting, so our friend made it on time. But I rushed over to see what I could do. When I got there, there were police and a very friendly employee of a local business who charged up the battery of the car so I could get it to the church. He actually charged it up three times before I got it back, and I am extremely grateful... Thank you, Jonathan!

Turns out that it was pretty easy to diagnose that the alternator had gone out. It was still smoking when I got there. Good news... the alternator on this car is right on top and SHOULD be relatively easy to replace. That might be the subject of my next post if all does not go well.

But it got me thinking about complicated systems like these. Cars have so many things going on in them. This part is connected to that part and to that one and if any one of them doesn't function properly, something will go wrong. For years the tire pressure monitoring system has been non-functional in this car. Annoying, but no big deal. But when the alternator goes out, that is a really big deal. The car won't run. Interestingly, it won't change gears, the key won't come out of the ignition... It's a mess.

Systems that are interconnected like this need care and maintenance to run efficiently. Even then, an unexpected issue can arise like the meltdown of an alternator, that will shut everything else down. That one failure stops the entire system.

It's like that in our lives, too. Maybe we have issues like the tire pressure monitoring system. It isn't going to shut us down, but it shows the system is not functioning perfectly. But a single important part can stop us in our tracks. When that happens, there's nothing to do but pull off on then side of the road, get a tow or get help from a friend or even a perfect stranger to get to where you can work on your system, and take the time to fix/heal.

Just as an extra word, the system is bigger than I would have imagined. Joy would not have been driving that car, except that last week we noticed a screw in the tire of Joy's normal car, and haven't had the time to take it in to get it fixed. So, she has been driving my old car instead. One small screw in the system, what seemed to be an entirely different system, led to today's frustrating breakdown.

It's good in these situations to recognize that this is no one's fault. It just happens. And we will take time out today to deal with the problem, fix it the best we can, and move on.

That, too, is the same for things that happen in our lives.

May you always have time to fix/heal when you need to do so, and may always know it's OK to take that time.

That's the view today.

Pastor Chris

Two Dimensions

Have you ever heard that dogs are unable to see what is happening on the television because it is only two dimensional? As I looked to see if this is true, I found that there really isn't a consensus about this. Many sites claim that the lights and colors on the screen are appealing to some dogs, but they are unable to make out shapes very well. Other sources say they can see about as well as they do in nature.

Another of life's mysteries that will remain mysterious to me.

But I do know that television is not only two dimensional in a literal way, it is also two dimensional in a figurative way. I think that leads us to a lot of frustration and unhappiness.

When we see people on television, when we follow their stories and their lives, we see super compelling things happening. Recently the show Game of Thrones ended with a lot of hype and conversation, and it reminded me just how deeply we can get into fantasy stories about people who have never really existed. We want the good to win, and usually in television, that happens. We want to see people struggle and then reach a moment of clarity or victory, so we can celebrate with them. And we dream that we, too, could win such a victory and live out our days happily ever after.

The almost unimaginable plot twists aren't only in our fantasy shows, however. They are in our realistic shows and even in what we call reality television. For the sake of the excitement of the story there must be a win against odds, or a fall from grace for the "bad people," or something else compelling enough to make us watch. Even on shows that are supposed to be about people in every day life, people are playing characters meant to compel us to watch.

Television can only show a two dimensional version of reality. For many of us, that two dimensional version is something we imagine happening in our own lives. Our conflicts will be perfectly resolved with just the right words. The problem we have been having will be solved within a thirty minute timeframe, and that problem will not arise again. Good will win, because it must, and bad will fail, because that is simply the way the world works.

But it isn't the way the world works. Things are messy. They don't work out the way we hope or expect. Conflicts don't magically resolve. We can't just put past issues behind and move on.

But we still expect these things, because, let's face it, television is the only time we feel like we are really able to look in at other families and see how they work. We only know our own lives and our own families. We may be very close to a few other families, but seeing the inner workings of how families really work... What's better for that than a show like "Modern Family?"

Since these are the only windows we have to other families, we imagine that's normal. That's how it's supposed to work. The reality is, there is no way it is supposed to work, except that we support one another through thick and thin with love. That will look different in every family. Even though we don't do this consciously, using television or other means to try to define what is normal for a family is harmful to us, because then we always feel weird, broken, unable to measure up. Maybe even a little boring.

Try to notice how you might expect things to be because of the vision of reality given to us through television. And try to remember that vision is two dimensional. Real life is three dimensions and involves conflict and lack of clarity and people doing things that seem out of character and all kinds of other things that don't fit into the box of a "good narrative." That's real life. And none of it is normal.

Anyway, that's the view today from where I stand.

Divisiveness

I made the mistake last week of watching some of the Judiciary Committee meeting of the House of Representatives as they contemplated whether or not to hold Attorney General William Barr in contempt of the House. I was curious how each side would frame their arguments, and I wanted to see what a reasonable argument would be for either case.

Likely because I don't spend much time watching actual proceedings in government, I was surprised by the level of derision displayed by each of the lawmakers as they made a point or refuted the previous point. The old saying "If looks could kill..." came to mind, and could have been altered to say, "If words could kill..."

One moment stood out when a lawmaker (I honestly do not remember which one or from which party) called out another representative for name calling and lack of decorum. It was such a moment of theatre. Each of these representatives, as they spoke to and about one another, were as spiteful and dismissive as they could be, even as they called one another "gentleman" and "gentlelady" and used terms like the honorable representative from such and such. Using names, profanity, whatever language one chose could hardly have sounded more derisive.

My thought is this: Is this what we have come to? Is this the best we can do? Is it necessary that in order to make a point we have to treat one another as if they are moronic, stupid beyond our ability to describe?

When we disagree with one another, can we do so in a respectful way, recognizing that the person who is disagreeing with us is likely not a complete imbecile? People are worthy of respect, whether we vehemently disagree with them or not.

This one episode that I witnessed on television seems to be part of a larger trend that has been exacerbated by the ability to snipe one another's comments on social media. Meaningful dialogue has been replaced by one liners meant to injure or discredit one another. I don't claim that this tendency is new in our world, one need only look at past political debate to prove that it isn't, but it seems to have increased so much so that there is no possibility of middle ground.

This plays out in so many different places in our daily lives. The church is not immune from this type of behavior. In some ways, because the stakes are high in religion, the church is even more contentious. But I don't believe that is the way God intended the church to be.

The overall ethos of the world is division, but the overall ethos of God is love and grace. Can we treat one another as if we really believe we are all children of God? Can we lower the level of animosity and see the places of fear that so many are reacting from? And can we see the fear within ourselves that causes us to react the way we do?

I am not advocating setting aside the importance of struggles for equality, for access to services like health care and housing for all, for an end to racism and sexism and other forms of injustice. As a Christian, I believe it is my duty to stand against all those forms of inequality. It is my hope that as a people we can speak about these issues in ways that do not dehumanize those who disagree. That is something I don't see happening in our government or in the rest of the world. To make a point, many choose to make anyone holding the opposing view less than human. But it is possible to disagree while still being genuinely respectful to one another. In fact, I believe it is necessary so all people everywhere can receive the respect we deserve as creations of God.

My takeaway is simple. Hopefully we can all try to lower the level of vitriol on social media and other platforms and use reasoned arguments instead of heated insults to make a point. It may not be reciprocated. But in the long run, I think it will improve the possibility of progress.

At least that's the view from where I stand today...

Anyone Feel Rich?

I listened to an episode of Hidden Brain on the NPR website this week while I cleaned my office. Many of you who are reading these words are wondering if I ever clean my office. I do, often on Mondays, and when I do, I often listen to some interesting and hopefully motivating music. By Wednesday, my office is a mess again.

This week I decided almost on a whim to listen to Hidden Brain.

I picked an episode entitled "Why No One Feels Rich: The Psychology of Inequality," also largely on a whim. It was a bit shorter than several of the other episodes, it was near the top of the menu, and the subject sounded interesting.

It had to do with the way that we judge ourselves. The subject matter was wealth, and whether we think we are wealthy or not. But the take-away for me was how we think of ourselves in almost all aspects of our lives. Are we successful in whatever way we choose to define success? Maybe it is about wealth, but maybe it is status. Maybe it is our looks. It could be anything we think of as defining us as successful or not.

Think of what you use to judge yourself. Is it your intrinsic worth? Is there some way to measure what you as a human are worth? Or is it your relative worth in comparison to others? The show made the point that no one feels rich because whomever we are, we are comparing ourselves with others. That type of comparison seems like many people would feel rich. After all, including myself, most Americans are within the upper few percentage points of the richest people in the world. According to the Global Rich List, an income of just over 32,000 American Dollars per year ranks one in the top 1% of earners in the world. Let that sink in for a minute.

http://www.globalrichlist.com/

That shows in a flash the economic disparity worldwide.

But most of us don't feel like we are rich. In fact, most of us feel, well, kind of the opposite. That's because, psychologically, we are pre-disposed to compare ourselves to people who are above us in our self-constructed ladders of success.

I recommend the podcast of Hidden Brain for details and statistics.

https://www.npr.org/2019/04/19/715145723/why-no-one-feels-rich-the-psychology-of-inequality

For reasons we don't understand, we compare ourselves to those we think are higher than ourselves and for that reason we always come up short. (Of course we come up short, because we choose to compare ourselves to people we think are higher up!) Maybe it is a good motivating factor for greater success. Or maybe it is part of the sinful condition of greed. Whatever it is, it causes us great stress, whether we are a high wage earner or not.

The stresses of this type of comparison rise greatly in societies where there is great disparity in income.

Is there a better measure? Of course there is. We know we are beautiful creatures. Those of us with the eyes of Christian faith believe that we are created in the image of the very God of the universe. Can't get better than that! And still we measure ourselves by standards we cannot reach. Even if we do reach them, we replace that standard with the next rung of the ladder, and see ourselves as lacking.

Of course, ambition to achieve higher goals can be good and motivating for success. But do we really have to beat ourselves up by constantly reminding ourselves that, in comparison to whomever, we are a failure?

To me, this is a byproduct of the myth of the American Dream. The myth is if you work hard enough, you can achieve anything. It is similar to the myth of the modern Prosperity Gospel, if you believe hard enough and pray to God hard enough, God will give you whatever you want.

The flip side to those beliefs is, if you don't achieve whatever you want, that means you didn't work hard enough, or if you don't receive the wealth or healing or whatever you have been praying for, you haven't believed hard enough or prayed hard enough.

How damaging that type of belief system is. It demeans us. It causes us to doubt our self-worth, and maybe even slip into self loathing.

Can we find a new measure, one that affirms our worth no matter our number of dollars? Is it possible to see the value of the small in comparison to the huge?

I believe it is. Our worth is in God, the creator and redeemer of the universe. God has made us, loved us, sustained us. God is our source of worth. It is sometimes hard to even catch a glimpse in today's world, but it is there through the eyes of faith. Hopefully, that vision is daily forming more fully. And that's the view from where I stand.

Judge Not...

There's a whole lot of judging going on in the world. It seems that humans have a built in sorting mechanism, and that mechanism is best at categorizing things and people into good or bad, beautiful or ugly, worthy or unworthy, pious or sinful, or any of a number of other categories. The world is not organized into these well-defined categories. It comes in multiple shades of every color, with sounds of different timbres, touch of every type of texture. Our judgement of what is good, of what is beautiful, of so many other things is personal, but it is also cultural. Our judgments are affected by our location, our experience, our personalities, our DNA, and countless other things.

We aren't even able to properly understand our own biases, although we do get better understanding when we try to examine those biases and how they affect our judgment of things, others, and ourselves. Those biases and our own judgements change so much over time that we should probably avoid hard and fast, unyielding views on most any topic. It's kind of like the saying about the weather in Tennessee, if you don't like it, just wait until tomorrow. It will be totally different.

As we walk through life, if our judgment is one thing today, it may be something totally different tomorrow because of experience, new information, or some other change in ourselves or our understanding.

I have found one particular judgement to be relatively consistent in my own life, unfortunately, and that is harsh judgment of myself. I know there are many who deal with the same thing. Sometimes it is overwhelming and unrelenting.

In my studies I learned about the different between guilt and shame. Guilt is the understanding that you have done something wrong. Shame happens when you think that you are wrong. We could slip into shame for any number of reasons. But living is hard when we look at mistakes or faults and think they define us.

If you look at yourself often and call yourself names, (stupid, ugly, worthless) know that this is not what God wants for you. God created you with God's own image. And you would never call God a bad name, right? Recognize in yourself that you are of God.

Yes, you are imperfect. Mistakes are made by the very best at any particular skill. No one is served by beating yourself up over a mistake. Let it go and do your best in the future, knowing that you'll make a mistake (or many) then, too.

Mistakes don't define you. God has defined you as beautiful, wonderful, worth loving and saving. Shouldn't that be enough for all of us to recognize our own worth?

Some of you may have read this post and wondered, but others like me know precisely where this is coming from. As I often tell the congregation I serve, I usually preach what I need to hear.

May the love of God surround you as you daily, moment by moment, choose to stop judging yourself. You are beautiful. You are wonderful. You are loved by a perfect and loving God. I'd say that makes you pretty awesome!

That's the view from where I stand today...

Pastor Chris

Accepting or Affirming?

A few years ago I wrote an opinion piece for a local newspaper. I was asked to do this from my perspective as a faith leader in the area. At that time, there was a recent religious controversy in the area because of a new faith center built in the city for a world religion other than Christianity. Many citizens were angry that this center was allowed to be built. Some protested. Lawsuits were filed.
In the end, the center was built here.

Having this in the recent history of the city, I wrote my piece about tolerance. One of the things I was most concerned with was the ability for people to allow those who are different to be present. So many times we overtly or covertly ask people to be different than who they are so they can fit into our society. Maybe it is the way they dress, maybe it is the way they act, maybe it is the way they talk. It could be almost anything. As we judge people into the box we prefer for them, we are denying them the truth that Christians proclaim that humans are made in the image of God. It will not be the same image of God that I or you are made in, but it is the image of God just the same. When we define the image of God as looking like me or you instead of someone else, we are limiting God through our own lack of imagination.

So I wrote a piece about tolerance. I thought it was pretty good. I had written a piece for this newspaper a few times before, but this was the first time I received a response from a reader.

To be honest, I'm not certain what the writer wanted to convey. But I think it was something like, "Bless your heart, you're so young and naïve. If you just knew what I know, you'd realize we can't tolerate..." The end of that sentence was not clear, but the gist was there are some people out there we just can't allow around us.

As I have lived more of life, I hope I have become less naive. But my impulse to tolerate has grown from tolerance to acceptance and finally to affirming. Let me be clear, when I say this, I mean I am affirming of all people who live to seek the good that God created them to be. That goes for different world religions, adherents of which I do not feel it is my place to judge by the criteria of my own religion. That goes for people who are on the sexuality spectrum whose sexuality is different from mine, but who want love and desire companionship just as much as I do.

It was in a discussion group with friends on the spectrum that I learned about the difference between acceptance and affirming. Acceptance means that it's OK, but often has the implication that it isn't as good as whatever the norm is. Affirming means you are just right the way you are.

There is evil in this world. It should be called out and named. But people who are loving and working toward God, even if it is in a way different from our way, deserve more than tolerance or acceptance. They deserve to be affirmed.

How beautiful would our world be if we were able to affirm one another for the image of God within, not despite our differences, but through and because of those differences? Those differences may just be glimpses of God's image that we could never get another way.

That's the view from the limited vantage point of where I stand.

Interpretation is a Choice

During a class in Divinity School, one of my professors was trying to help the class to understand how we make meaning from the bible. She used a simple illustration that was perhaps so simple that it was profound. She took a copy of the bible, placed it on a table in the center of the room and said that if we wanted to know what the bible said about a certain subject, we could ask it. Of course, the bible itself wasn't going to speak back to us. That was the point.

The bible doesn't say anything. It is a book. The letters on the page are meaningless to anyone who doesn't read the language in which that bible was printed. And knowing that the bible was written in ancient forms of languages that most of us aren't able to read, we have to realize that whatever we get in our English language bibles has already been interpreted for us by the folks who translated it.

Those squiggles on the page that we call letters only have meaning when we give them meaning. So, the only way there is meaning in the printed words on the page of the bible, or any other book for that matter, is when we give those words meaning. Even with the same exact words on the page, with many of the same life experiences, we may come up with vastly different ways of reading a text.

Here's a silly example: what do you think of when you hear the word "car?" Most of us would probably think of those things that we drive around, but some might think of train cars or cars on roller coasters. There may be other different types of cars. But even those of us who think of those things we drive around, what type of car do we think of? Is it new? Old? Red? Small? All of the different types of cars can come to mind just with that one word. So even though we have the same word in the same context, there is no reason to think we would all be thinking of the same thing.

That is greatly multiplied when we read an ancient text that has been translated into our modern language. 

But there is one constant. Whatever meaning we make of the language, it is a meaning that we make. In other words, the words on the page don't mean anything until we create that meaning for them.

My point is this. We choose how we interpret words, paragraphs, whole books. We make meaning as we go along. That meaning isn't even fixed for us... How many times have we re-read something we read at a different time in our lives and found a completely different meaning?

The bible itself does not exclude anyone. It doesn't oppress anyone. It doesn't hurt anyone. Those things only happen because people choose that meaning from scripture. In short, the bible doesn't exclude, people do that.

We have much better tools to study scripture than were available just a few years ago. We have better understandings of culture, more examples of ancient languages, new theories of understanding. Those can all assist us in making meaning of the bible or any other writing. But ultimately we choose what those writings mean, for good for ourselves and others or for bad for ourselves and others.

I believe in a God who is good and loving to the world. I believe that the book inspired by that God would not be intended to harm people. That's how I choose to interpret the scripture.

Whatever you choose, recognize that the bible doesn't make meaning of itself, only we do that.

That's the view from where I stand...

Our Brains

I recently read a book written by Lauren Haynes, a member of the church I serve. The title of the book is A Different Road. This book details the struggles she and her family went through as they raised and continued to care for a man with very different brain function than what most people would consider normal. He is autistic and suffers from depression and Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder.

One frustration she and her family would often face was that her son is extremely intelligent, but the autism symptoms affect the way he expresses himself. Since he grew up in the middle of the 20th century, that often led to people thinking he was unintelligent, and treating him like a child or even a lost cause. Several doctors encouraged the family to institutionalize the young man and forget that he was their son.

The book is available on Amazon, and it is a wonderful, heart-breaking read.

Haynes makes a point several times throughout the book, and it is something I have been reflecting on quite a bit since reading it. She mentions how much effort is put into healing diseases of the body, and then suggests that we should spend as much or maybe much more researching how to heal the brain. After all, the brain is much more complex than any of those other systems of the body.

My brain works strangely. At least, I think it does, in comparison to others. I have a mental illness called Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. OCD is often presented in media as a kind of funny thing. Haha, that guy has to wash his hands all the time. Haha, that woman has to have all the cans lined up a certain way. OCD is a serious, debilitating disorder. At its heart, OCD is about uncertainty. It manifests itself in many different ways, but the result is a set of rituals, physical or mental, that are meant to eliminate the uncertainty. Sometimes they are logical, as in knowing that anti-bacterial soap kills germs, but maybe I missed one, so I ought to do it one more time. Another logical one might be checking the oven or the door, because maybe you just forgot that you really did leave it on, even though you just checked. Others are more mystical or even magical, like counting steps or making sure to balance the twitches of the face. Sometimes they are totally mental as in continually checking to make sure you aren't a bad person or going to do a bad thing.

There were times in my life when these compulsions were overwhelming. I realize to someone who doesn't suffer from OCD these things may sound ridiculous.

There are good things that come from OCD as well. Usually someone with OCD will do a project with excellence, partly because if something is short of perfection they will take it apart and do it again and again until they are satisfied. That makes some projects take a really long time for me. But the end result is that the project is done as well as I am capable of doing it.

Fortunately my OCD is under reasonable control now. I will always suffer with it to some extent, but when I have good habits and am sure to take medication that balances the chemicals in my brain, I am better.

I am writing all this because mental illness is still stigmatized. People are unwilling to seek treatment for something they want to simply think their way out of. Haynes' book reminded me that the brain is the most complex part of the body. We know so little about how it works. Why would we think it needs less medical intervention than the heart or the stomach?

For those of you who struggle with a form of mental illness, you are not alone. It's common, normal even, to have these struggles. Don't add to the struggles by shaming yourself for having an illness.

For those who do not struggle with mental illness, be grateful. Not only that, please recognize that those who do have mental illness aren't simply weak or lacking in any way. Our brains don't work the same way yours do. That doesn't keep us from being smart, helpful, inventive, or whatever other positive things you can add to that list.

Thanks, Lauren Haynes, for reminding me.

That's the view from where I stand today...

From Where I Stand: Challenges

The ancient Greek philosopher, Heraclitus, stated, "Change is the only constant. There is nothing permanent except change."

Well, that's what we think he meant. He actually said it in ancient Greek. So for us to understand it, it had to be translated from one language to another and from one time period and culture to another. I guess, proving its own point, the words had to be changed so modern people could understand their meaning.

Is there a time in life when it is appropriate to stop learning? Is there a time when things become settled and there is no need to continue to develop?

It is inspiring to see people in my life who late in their own lives continue to seek out new opportunities to grow, new opportunities to learn about people who are different from themselves, and new opportunities to expand their horizons. And I wonder about what motivates our change. What is it that makes some of us seek it out while others are so resistant? And what makes us willing to accept change on some issues, but not at all on other things?

There is a theory that a friend described to me that says we only experience real change through crisis. That applies to individuals and to institutions. Think about how resistant to change large companies or churches can be, until the point when they realize that they are in crisis. Many large brick and mortar stores who have been dominant in the past have gone out of business because they didn't understand how to adapt to the change in culture.

It is my hope that in my life it will not take crisis for me to continue to grow and change. In order to do that, my hope is to continue to change through challenge. If I am going to become someone new, if I am going to learn something new, it will happen because I am challenged.

Think of the difficulty of learning a new skill like a new musical instrument. It is uncomfortable. It is frustrating. Often you may feel like throwing up your hands and quitting. And yet, if you persevere, you learn something new. And you become different.

As a pastor I view so many things through the lens of the church. Sometimes people come into a church and want it to be what it has always been. That is comforting, but it isn't challenging. It isn't helping anyone to grow. It may simply be reinforcing an understanding that was appropriate at a different time, but may now need to be reexamined. But if those things are never challenged, there will never be growth.

Find a community that challenges you to become a better member of our society, a better follower of your tradition, a better human. Don't run from challenge, embrace it, because through challenge comes change. And change is good. It is the only constant.

Grace to you,
Pastor Chris

From Where I Stand: Limiting God?

Language is important. The way we think about things and the way we talk about things and people affects the way those things and people seem to us. When my daughter was a baby, she didn't have much hair. Joy and I would take her out somewhere, and people would come up to see the beautiful new baby. (She was and is beautiful). It didn't matter if she was dressed in a frilly pink dress with a pink bow on her head, people regularly said he was a good looking young boy. 

The perception of who they thought our daughter was didn't change who she was, but it limited their vision to see her.

That is one of the ways that we limit God. Our language about God is often gendered. I think most people would agree that God is neither male nor female, but calling God "he" all of the time overtly and covertly limits who we think God is. If God is primarily male, that means God is only secondarily female. If we continue in that line of thinking, we can see where people might continue in sexist thought. The same type of problems arise when we think of God as a particular ethnicity, gender, color, or whatever limiting factors we want to throw in there. If God is more like one sort of people, then God is less like another sort of people. The way we think about and speak about God doesn't really limit God, but it limits our ability to see God.

There's another limiting factor that we place on God--the ability for God to call whomever God chooses. In the United Methodist Church there has been a recent ruling against allowing people in the LGBTQ+ community to be ordained clergy. A push for the same type of ruling is happening within the denomination I serve. Here's why I think this is a bad idea.

Humans are little like God. In our understanding, our power, our abilities, we are not like God at all. Yet we strive to become like God. That is at the heart of the story of the first sin. The tempter said if the humans ate of that particular fruit, they would be like God. Of course they tried it. If there was a chance of being like God, that would be pretty hard to resist.

Yet, we are still nothing like God, not having God's understanding. We can't even understand out neighbors across the street who are so much like us in so many ways. The efforts to determine who God can call to ministry and who God can't call are like people trying to eat of the fruit. People want to put themselves in the place of God and say this one's in, and this one's out. That's limiting a limitless God.

Scripture is filled with examples of surprising people who were called by God. That is to say, the surprises are for us, not for God. God saw the qualities in people in scripture that we would never see, and many that those who were called did not even see themselves. God called them, and they served. Thankfully an institution didn't stop people like Moses, David, Abraham, Jacob, Mary the mother of Jesus, and many others from serving. They heard the call from God and they responded.  

The people of this time will continue to disagree on many things. Limiting God is something we should agree about. God cannot be limited. Our language, our culture, and many other things limit our ability to understand God and other people. But let's not make the mistake of saying that God intends for us to limit God's work in the world. I think if we'd just accept people who have been called by God to serve, and if we'd step back and get out of their way, we'd see some awesome work that God can do through loving people. That may be surprising to some of us, but it isn't a surprise to God.

Anyway, that's the view from where I stand.

From Where I Stand: Letting Go

It is Lent in the Christian church, and many people choose to observe Lent by giving something up. It can be a time of letting go of something, ideally something that gets in the way of our relationship with God. I have found that some of the things that we hold most dearly can be things that interfere with our relationship with God. That makes Lent a powerful time for those who have courage enough to let go of some really dear things.

In the life of ministry, sometimes we have to let go of some really dear things. I have found that one of the hardest things to do in ministry is to let go of people. By that I mean people who have been part of the church, who have stood side by side with you as you face difficulty, who have worshiped with you and then choose to leave the church. I have also found that it is hard to find a safe space to discuss the pain one feels as a leader of a congregation in the middle of these types of losses. It is easier, and in some ways expected, that leaders just put on a happy face and focus on the positive aspects of ministry, while wishing those who choose another path well. And while that is assuredly the best way to move forward, it is important to acknowledge that there is grief that goes along with it.

Thankfully, you probably aren't all like me, but I spend time wondering what I did or could have done, what was missing or what was off-putting, and how this can inform my service to God. Of course, losing people in relationship is hard enough, but the added pressure (certainly added by myself) of wondering if this is an indictment of how I am serving God in this context makes this process even harder.

But letting go is about more than that. I need, as a servant of God and as a servant of people, to trust that God and others know what they need better than I do. I need to step back and give thanks for the service we shared during that season, and simply trust in the grace of the Holy Spirit that we are all where we are supposed to be.

And in doing that, I need to give up something I have a hard time giving up for Lent, and for good. It is something that I struggle with daily, hourly, all the time, and yet, I have to give it up and let it go. I need to let go of my pride. It doesn't all come down to me, it comes down to God. I may be in the role of leader, but more importantly I am a servant. I serve the people of my congregation and I serve God. If my pride interferes with that service, it is getting in the way of my relationship with God and with people, and it has to go. And not just for Lent, for good.

I am working on it... I thank you for patience with me while I work on it.

As always, may God bless you all.

Pastor Chris

From Where I Stand- Ashes to Ashes

Today the church enters into a holy season, the season of Lent. Lent is the forty days before Easter, not including Sundays, which are reserved as days to celebrate the Resurrection. We remember our mortality during this time. We impose ashes today, Ash Wednesday, as a reminder of our need to repent.

In the "old days" when something happened and people wanted to get God's attention, they would impose ashes and put on sackcloth. In the book of Job, Job does this to symbolize his mourning before God. This is a common practice in the Old Testament. Ash Wednesday is a recognition that, as sinners, we all need to repent before God. The time period before the holiest day of the year, Resurrection Sunday, is an appropriate time to take stock of who we are, what we have done and what we have been, and determine to be better.

Years ago I had an experience that gave a new significance to repentance for me. In an interfaith worship experience, I was led by a Jewish colleague in what is known as a t'shuvah service. The word t'shuvah is a Hebrew word for turning. The point of repentance isn't simply to stop whatever behavior is an issue, it is the process of turning from that behavior.

Since that time, I have associated repentance with "turning." This is something the worshipers in my congregation will hear about tonight in our worship service. But I want to turn some attention to the idea of ashes being a reminder of our mortality and what that can mean for us as people, whether we are Christians or not.

Most people do not want to die. Studies in psychology or in literature often focus on our fear of death. We cannot imagine that someday we will not exist. It is so stressful to think of this that we resist even the thoughts. We put off conversations about how we wish to be remembered or how we wish to be cared for at the end of life.

There are some who think this stress about the end of life is at the root of religion, especially at the root of religions that teach there is an afterlife.

But thinking about death is not so bad. I recognize that I will not live forever. That is one of the things that motivates me to do my best right now. It reminds me that I need to work toward something. It reminds me that if I want to leave my mark on the world, hopefully a mark for good, I don't have time to spare. In my tradition, it reminds me that if I want to be as good a person as I can be, I don't have time to dilly dally. I need to work on it all the time, every day.

And then, if I know me, even when I come closer to my end, I will worry that I haven't done enough. For those who know me well, that will not be a surprise. My hope is that if we can think on these things now, most of you won't have that worry. My hope is that if we can imagine a future world where we are no longer alive, it will give us the ability to live for that future so that the world will be better because we were here.

Ashes to ashes...When I am one day ashes, I hope that the world will be better because I lived. To me, that is the point of repentance, the point of Lent, the point of Ash Wednesday, and the point of recognizing our place in the universe, for the believer as a tiny part of the creation of the infinite God, but much the same for others to recognize their small part in such a vast universe.

Perhaps all we can do is a small part to make a better world, but we can do that. As we realize we will one day be ashes or dust, we remember that we need to turn now.

At least that's the view from where I stand.

From Where I Stand... Empathy

In recent days I have been powerfully and painfully reminded of the types of struggles that everyone goes through. As a pastor, sometimes people are willing to share with me things that they might keep hidden from almost everyone else. Many times they keep these pains and struggles hidden from me as well. In that case, I can only hope to present myself as a safe partner for conversation, and maybe they will be able to be open in the future.

Many diverse people have felt comfortable enough with me in the past few days that they have told me about their struggles. Most are people that others wouldn't even know were suffering. Some are the most optimistic people I know. Everyone is going through something. Everyone is struggling in some way. Everyone has a past, or a fear for the future, or an immediate need. Most have all three.

We do each other a disservice when we think we are the only ones with trouble. Maybe this is at the source of much of our disagreement and misunderstanding of one another. When we aren't able to remember that everyone around us is just as broken as we are in some way, we become less able to offer grace and forgiveness in our relationships. It can cause us to become legalistic, pretending that one size fits all in our rules and regulations, and it keeps us from being able to see the human stories in every conflict.

Jesus modeled this for us as he was confronted with questions about the law and how it should be applied to people. Jesus frequently said things like, "You have heard that it was said... But I say..." When he said those things, I think Jesus wanted us to think about what the letter of the law or rule or cultural norm said, and then ask ourselves what the person we are attempting to judge might feel about that. If someone is hurt, and it is not allowed to heal on the Sabbath, is the person or the law more important? If someone is caught in adultery, and the law is to stone them, which of us should not be stoned for our own sins?

Jesus took the time to learn about the people in these situations and take their circumstances, their pain, their struggles into consideration. We are called to do the same. This is understandably easier for us to do for people who are most like us. But all people are God's people, and we have a responsibility to do our best to understand the pain, the struggles, the needs of others no matter how different they are from ourselves. That is the hard work of following Jesus and of being a good citizen of the world. But if we could do that work better... How many misunderstandings could be avoided? How many conflicts could be lessened? How much more love could there be in the world?

Wouldn't you like to find out?

That's the view from where I stand today. This is a personal reflection. I don't speak for any institution, just for myself and my understanding of how to live into what God calls me to be. Blessings!

Pastor Chris